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This Baby Talk Opens Girls' Eyes

Tribune photo by D’ANN LAWRENCE WHITE

Burnett Middle School eighth-graders Cierra Strother, Katherine Martinez and Asia Thompson, from left, were among 20 girls who participated in the debut of the GIRLS Talk program.

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By D'ANN LAWRENCE WHITE

dlwhite@tampatrib.com

Published: February 11, 2009

SEFFNER - An eighth-grader at Burnett Middle School, Asia Thompson confessed the idea of having a baby was somewhat appealing.

"I'd see these girls showing off their pregnant stomachs and all those cute little outfits for the baby," said the 14-year-old. "I thought it'd be cool to have a baby."

Then came the reality check.

Fortunately, Thompson got to experience life with a baby without taking on the responsibility and financial burden of a child of her own. Through the Girls Scouts of West Central Florida's GIRLS Talk program, Thompson spent three days with a lifelike infant simulator.

The RealCare Baby made by RealityWorks is a robotic, soft-vinyl facsimile of a newborn to 3-month-old infant. The caregiver wears a wireless ID bracelet, and the robotic baby only recognizes that person as its caregiver.

When the baby needs to be fed, burped, rocked and diapered, the caregiver must promptly respond. If the caregiver shakes the baby, doesn't support its head properly, handles the baby roughly or ignores its needs, it will be recorded in the simulator's software.

"We call this part of the program 'Baby, Think It Over,'" said MemorieAnne Brown, program specialist for the GIRLS Talk program, an acronym for Girls In Real-Life Situations. "The girls found out quickly that having a crying baby around isn't nearly as fun as they think it is. And they discover that babies do die of neglect."

Thompson was among 20 Burnett girls who signed on for the debut of the GIRLS Talk program at the middle school. The program ran for 10 weeks starting in October, meeting each Friday morning at the school.

The program was simultaneously offered at McLane Middle School and Middleton High School, funded through the Greater Brandon Community Foundation, the Community Foundation of Greater Sun City Center and the 21st Century Foundation, a black philanthropy organization.

A new group of girls will begin the program at the schools in March.

Burnett student intervention specialist Juanita Young asked that Burnett be one of the schools to get the program because she believed it would complement other programs she was offering.

"I've started a mentoring group for boys because one day they will be heads of their households and they need to be looking at careers now," said Young, noting that she has 22 boys in the group. "And, through the Student Advisory Committee, I have a program to empower teens. We grab the teens who are shy, who have attendance problems and who are not working to their potential. I was looking for a program specifically for the girls, and this fit the bill."

She said the middle school years are an especially difficult time for girls.

"They're not yet women, but society forces them to grow up too soon," she said. "They're still naïve, but they want to fit in and feel a part of the crowd, so they end up making rash decisions. I thought this program was a good way for them to get information they needed to make smart decisions."

The program wasn't just about the realities of parenthood, said Burnett eighth-grader Katherine Martinez.

"During the first part of the program, we talked about making the right friends and overcoming our fears," she said.

The girls also addressed such topics as self-awareness, self-esteem, the media's impact on how they see themselves, careers, bullying, anger management, conflict resolution and making difficult decisions.

"We created an honest, open space where the girls felt free to talk with the understanding that this was their safe place," Brown said. "They can ask me anything, and if I don't know the answer, I'll find it and come back with it."

"I thought the program was fun," said Burnett eighth-grader Cierra Strother. "We talked about what we wanted to be when we grow up. We did different activities about stereotypes. And we talked about judging people, how we should take the time to get to know a person. We found out that we all have things in common. We all have problems. We all walk around with baggage, and you never know what baggage the other person might be carrying."

"It's true," Thompson said. "If you just take the time to listen, you find out that a person you normally wouldn't talk to before likes the same things you do."

During the last three weeks of the program, the girls discussed parenting, including the costs of raising a baby.

Brown said the girls had no concept of the price of diapers, formula and baby food.

"They underestimated the cost of everything," she said.

"I thought I'd die laughing," Young said. "They thought a pack of diapers would cost $5."

Then came the crucial day when the girls received their robotic babies.

"We all pretty much proved ourselves unworthy," Martinez said.

Thompson and her younger sister Aishia, 13, also a member of the GIRLS Talk program, brought the robotic babies home at the same time.

"They wouldn't stop crying," Thompson said. "I'd be sleeping, and the baby would start crying, wanting me to hold the bottle. As soon as I'd put it down, it'd start crying again. If a real baby acts like this, I don't know ..."

Strother was confident she could handle the baby. After all, she practically raised her niece. And she has a 14-year-old friend who just had a baby.

However, after three full days with an infant, she had had enough.

"It's hard to raise a baby," she said. "I wouldn't want a baby now. It'd interfere with my education and prevent me from doing things I want to do in my life, like travel. It's OK for some people, but not for me. I've got my whole life ahead of me."

For information, visit www.gswcf.org.

Reporter D'Ann Lawrence White can be reached at (813) 657-4524.

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